Pull up a chair. The Venting Bench is open.
Have you ever noticed how quickly we're reminded to be grateful when we admit something is driving us crazy?
Tired of your job? Be thankful you have one.
Your kids are getting on your last nerve? Be grateful you have children.
Your husband driving you absolutely nuts? Well, not everybody has a husband.
And that's true.
But can we acknowledge something?
Being grateful for somebody doesn't mean they don't occasionally make you want to scream into a pillow.
You can love your husband with your whole heart and still wonder how one grown man can walk past the same pile of laundry seventeen times without noticing it.
You can adore your children and still dream of a house where nobody asks you what's for dinner.
You can appreciate your job and still be exhausted from being everybody's emergency backup plan.
And you can love Jesus and still have days when your attitude needs a little extra attention.
Welcome to being human.
The Problem With Trying to Measure Up
Somewhere along the way, a lot of us got the idea that we're supposed to have everything together.
The clean house. The happy marriage. The successful children. The fulfilling career. The healthy body. The strong faith. The positive attitude.
Preferably all before breakfast.
Meanwhile, some of us are standing in the kitchen trying to remember why we walked in there.
And then we open social media.
Everybody's houses are beautiful. Their marriages are wonderful. Their children are thriving. Their vacations look like postcards.
And suddenly, our ordinary, complicated lives feel like we're doing something wrong.
But we're comparing everything we know about our own lives to the tiny little piece somebody else chooses to show us.
We don't know what happens after the camera turns off.
We don't know how much help they have, what they're struggling with, or what they worry about at three in the morning.
And we certainly don't know whether they're sitting in their own kitchen wondering why everybody else seems to have it figured out.
Maybe you're not failing at life. Maybe you're just living the part that doesn't make it into the pictures.
Introducing the Venting Bench
We've talked about the garden being a place where everybody belongs.
No VIP section. No bad-girl corner. No requirement that you arrive blooming.
Well, I think it's time we make room for something else.
A little corner of the garden where you can admit that you're frustrated, tired, overwhelmed, irritated, or just plain fed up.
We're calling it the Venting Bench.
No, we're not starting a complaint department. And we're certainly not building a Wailing Wall.
We don't want to spend our days criticizing everybody around us.
But sometimes you need to say something out loud before it stops taking up so much room in your head.
Sometimes you don't need advice.
You don't need a motivational speech.
And you definitely don't need somebody telling you to look on the bright side before you've even finished your sentence.
Sometimes you just need somebody to say, "Girl, I get it."
And maybe laugh with you a little.
Because here's something I believe:
You can count your blessings and still need to complain about one of them.
Gratitude and frustration can sit on the same bench.
And before anybody gets the wrong idea, we're not making light of our faith.
I take my relationship with Jesus seriously. Very seriously, actually.
But that doesn't mean I have to take myself seriously every minute of the day.
I can love Jesus, laugh at something ridiculous, get irritated with a bad driver, and occasionally have a sarcastic comment escape before my better judgment catches up.
I'm a work in progress. Aren't we all?
We're not watering down our faith. We're making room for the personalities God gave us.
And if your personality is a little quieter, a little more reserved, or a little less sarcastic than mine? Pull up a seat anyway.
There's room for you, too.
We don't need to make other women feel unwelcome to make imperfect women feel at home.
So Here's Your Invitation
We're going to start bringing some Venting Bench questions to our Wildflower social media pages.
Some will be funny. Some might make you think. And some might remind you that you're not nearly as alone as you thought.
Here's our first question:
What's something you're genuinely grateful for that also drives you absolutely crazy sometimes?
Maybe it's your job. Your family. Your house. Your never-ending to-do list.
You can keep it funny, keep it simple, or share something real.
And if you don't feel like commenting, that's okay too. You can just read along.
There are no attendance requirements in this garden.
Look for our Venting Bench posts on Wildflower's social pages and join the conversation whenever you feel like it.
Because this garden was never meant to be a place where everybody pretends to have it all together.
It was meant to be a place where we could finally stop pretending.
All messy blooms welcome.
Wildflower After Winter